BLUES SONG ABOUT ANTACIDS

MAYBE I CLENCH MY JAW WHEN I SLEEP OR THAT'S
IT, IT'S OVER, I'M OUT OF HERE. DON'T WORRY.
RIGHT NOW I AM HAVING BREATHING ISSUES AND
THE INTERNET HAS A LOT TO SAY ABOUT BREATHING.
LET'S SAY I HAVE A LOT TO DO BEFORE I'M 27 AND
DEAD. OF THOSE THINGS, WHICH SHOULD I DO FIRST?
USER GENERATED CONTENT IS NOT A WALL OUTLET.
I AM NOT AN ORANGE CORD. SHUT UP, PLATEFACE.
MY PARENTS DIDN'T LIKE IT WHEN I SAID "WELL,
27 IS IT FOR ME ANYWAY. NICK DRAKE, ETC."
PEAK OIL WILL PREVENT A "LONG HAPPY LIFE."
THERE IS A LONG-ISH HAIR ON MY MONITOR.
NO ONE WANTS A LECTURE ON RELATIVITY.
NO ONE WANTS TO SAP THE CARBONATION.
KENDRA, RELAX. I AM DRINKING VODKA AND
ORANGE JUICE. SOMEONE TELL ME TO RELAX
CORRECTLY, I.E. HELP. PARAPHRASING RBG:
"I WANT TO FIND OUT WHICH OF OUR FRIENDS
DIES FIRST, SO WE CAN ALL BE LESS GOOD
FRIENDS WITH THEM." YES, YES. I WANT TO
1) WRITE THIS RURAL INTERNET LIAR NOVEL.
2) RELEASE ONE FULL LENGTH BOOK OF
WHITE TRASH JOHN ASHBERY DOODLEFACE
POETRY. YOU'LL THANK ME LATER. "WOW,
ONE BOOK OF POETRY AND THEN HE DIES.
HMM. PUT THAT ON THE UGLY SIDE OF THE
"GOOFUS & GALLANT ROCK STAR EQUATION."
3) TOUR THE NATION ON THE MERITS OF
AN ALBUM I MAKE CALLED "ANYWAY, THE
RAIN CAME THROUGH LIKE A HITCHHIKER."
I HAVE NOT DONE ANY OF THESE THINGS
YET. THAT IS WHAT'S CALLED AN OPTIMISTIC
LINE BREAK STRATEGY. THIS IS WHAT'S
OVERTURNED, UNHUSHED, BELLY FAZED.
I TURN MY ENTIRE LIFE OVER TO BARR,
THE BAND. PLEASE CONTINUE WHAT YOU
STOPPED A LONG TIME AGO FOR NO GOOD
REASON AND TRY IN THE FASHION CALLED
HARDER. DON'T ASK ME WHY THEY CALL
YOU IN THE MIDDLE OF THE PARTY WITH
WEIRD REQUESTS LIKE: "PLEASE COME TO
MASSACHUSETTS, CRAWL IN MY CHEST,
GIVE ME A FREE BREATHING LESSON."