Tuesday, January 29, 2008

PLAGUE

SO THERE IS THIS
POINT YOU ARE TRYING
TO MAKE
AND IT'S ON THE
TIP OF YOUR TONGUE.
THIS POINT THAT WILL
FINISH AN ARGUEMENT.
YOU'RE WAITING YOUR
TURN FOR THE RIGHT MOMENT.
IT'S GOTTA BE THE RIGHT MOMENT.
IT HAS TO BE.
THIS MOMENT HAS SURPRISED YOU
AND PUSHED ITSELF
OUT OF THE PIT OF YOUR STOMACH,
MAKING YOU NAUSEAS ALMOST.
BUT,
WHEN IT ARRIVES
IN THE PRESENT
IT ONLY FLOWS ALONG
WITH THE REST OF
WHAT'S JUST BEEN SAID.
NO ONE REALIZES THAT
YOUR IDENTITY ABOUT
SOMETHING
HAS BEEN REVEALED
AND PUT OUT
IN THE OPEN.
TOO MANY THINGS
ARE OUT IN THE OPEN AND
ARE TOO EASILY
ACCESSIBLE
THAT YOUR GUT FEELING
HAS TURNED INTO
THROW UP.
WASHED AWAY
ON A CRACKED STREET
UP A HILL TO NOWHERE.

I DONT KNOW WHAT TO SAY ABOUT THIS ENCOUNTER OTHER THAN IT WAS PEACEFUL AND WEIRD

I GOT MY
PUSSY WAXED TONIGHT
WHICH IS SILLY
CAUSE I HAVE NO
LOVER

THE WOMAN WHO
WAXED ME
WAS UKRAINIAN
AND I LIKED HER

EVERY TIME,
AFTER SHE TORE
AT MY BODY
SHE PETTED MY FOREHEAD
AND SAID
"YOU ARE BRAVE GOYLE, DAHLINK"
AND IT FELT
LOVING

SHE GAVE ME
A HUG WHEN I LEFT
AND SAID
SHE LIKED NICE
CLIENTS
AND I WAS
EMOTIONALLY CONFUSED

Monday, January 28, 2008

I JUST ATE A FUCKING CLOVE OF GARLIC CAUSE I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE FUNNY, MY TIMING WAS GREAT, I MADE TWO GIRLS LAUGH AT ONCE

JUST NOW
I BURPED
AND IT TASTED
LIKE THE GARLIC
I JUST ATE

MY ROOMMATE
SHE LOVES ME
IM SURE

SHE LAUGHS AT
EVERY LITTLE THING
I DO
AND IT MAKES ME
FEEL INVINCIBLE

BECAUSE
I LOVE HER
TOO

SHE HAD A
DREAM ABOUT
TRIBAL MASTURBATION
AND JUST TOLD ME
ABOUT IT
AND I WANTED
TO SWADDLE HER
IN A BLANKET
LIKE A BABY
SO BAD

FOR THE SAKE OF THIS POEM I WILL BELIEVE IN GOD

I WILL PUSH MY FOREHEAD INTO YOURS
UNTIL MY BRAIN OVERTAKES YOUR BRAIN
AND MY FACE OVERTAKES YOUR FACE
WE WILL MELD UNTIL THE UNIVERSE I KNOW
AND THE UNIVERSE YOU KNOW
BECOMES ONE CONSOLIDATED UNIVERSE
OF GOOD AND BAD
AND THEN WE WILL RUN EQUATIONS ON OUR UNIVERSE
WE WILL ERASE THE HIGHEST AND THE LOWEST FACTORS
WE WILL TAKE WHAT IS IN THE MIDDLE
AND REMEMBER THAT THE HIGH AND THE LOW ARE GONE
THERE WILL BE NO DRAMA HERE
WHEN I SAY I LOVE YOU
I USED TO BE ABLE TO LOVE YOU MORE
WHEN I SAY I HATE YOU
I USED TO BE ABLE TO HATE YOU MORE
THAT IS HOW IT WILL BE
WE WILL RELEGATE GOD
TO THE BOARD OF PERSPECTIVE

Sunday, January 27, 2008

FORMS OF THERAPY

KYLE CALLED IT THERAPY
I DRANK SEVEN BEERS
I SAID, KYLE YOU ARE RIGHT
WE LEFT THE HOUSE AND WALKED TO A BAR
I DRANK A WHISKEY SOUR AND A GIN AND TONIC
I FELT LIKE WATER DISPLACED BY A NUCLEAR SUBMARINE
I BOUGHT THREE PBR'S
ONE FOR ME
ONE FOR STEVE
ONE FOR KYLE
I SMOKED THE REST OF MY CIGARETTES
I TALKED TO STEVE ABOUT THE OLYMPICS
I TOLD HIM ABOUT OLYMPIC PARK
AND THE BOMBING
AND HOW I STOOD THERE
SEVERAL HOURS BEFORE IT EXPLODED
AND HOW I DIDN'T GIVE A FUCK
AND FELT NOTHING
AND STILL FEEL NOTHING

YELLOW TAIL

MY TRANSLUCENT MASK IS
RUNNING THIN SO I
APPLIED A LAYER
OF LOTION TO
MY FACE
TO MAKE IT SEEM
LIKE COMMUNICATION
WAS STILL
OK
BUT FOUND MYSELF
USING MY NAPKIN
TO WIPE
UP THE DRIPS
AND SLIPPING ON
THE RESIDUE
AND FALLING
ONTO THE CONCRETE.
I LOOKED UP
AND SAW EYES STARING AT ME.
ASKING ME QUESTIONS.
I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY
SO I LOOKED PASSED THEM.
UNFOCUSED AND REFOCUSED
ON THE CLOUDS
PASSING
ABOVE THEIR
HEADS.
THEY WERE MOVING FAST.
SO WAS I.
SOMETIMES I WISH
I WAS THE SKY
INSTEAD OF THE CLOUDS.
THINGS WOULDN'T
BE
SO
RUSHED.

FUCK YOU HENRY

WHEN I WAS A TEENAGER
I WAS PREGNANT FOR
A WHILE
I WORRIED
ALL THE TIME
ABOUT WHAT I WAS GOING
TO DO ABOUT IT
I GOOGLED
ABORTIONS
AND I NEVER TOLD
A SINGLE PERSON


I HAD A MISCARRIAGE
I JUST KIND OF SHIT IT OUT
I WAS ON THE TOILET
BECAUSE I HAD A STOMACH
ACHE
AND IT CAME RIGHT OUT OF ME
AND I SAT ON THE TOILET
AND STARED BETWEEN MY LEGS
AT THE LITTLE LUMP OF EMBRYO
AND I NAMED IT
HENRY
AND I SPIT ON IT
AND SAID
FUCK YOU HENRY!
FOR ALMOST RUINING MY
YOUNG LIFE!
AND THEN
I WENT ON
AND I NEVER TOLD
A SINGLE LIVING SOUL
OR A DEAD ONE
EITHER

Saturday, January 26, 2008

Thursday, January 24, 2008

I TRIPPED ON THE SIDEWALK ON MY WAY HOME TONIGHT AND FELL FACE FIRST IM GLAD NO ONE WAS AROUND TO SEE IT

I GOT STONED TONIGHT
WITH MY BOSS
AFTER A MEETING
HE HAS TAKEN A
FANCY TO ME
HE TREATS ME
LIKE A DAUGHTER
WHO'S OPINION HE
DOES NOT IGNORE
AND WHOM HE
LIKES TO DRINK
AND GET HIGH WITH

IT WAS A NICE NIGHT
DRINKING AND SMOKING
WITH A GROUPING OF
ADULTS
REAL ADULTS
WHO SEEMED TO THINK
I WAS ONE OF THEM

DID I MENTION
THAT IT WAS
NICE TO GET STONED
TOO?

I AM NOT AND
ADULT
I DONT EAT BROCOLLI
I HATE IT
ITS EVEN BEEN
POINTED OUT TO ME
RECENTLY
HOW CHILDISH I AM

I DONT KNOW
IF WHEN IT WAS
POINTED OUT
THAT IT WAS SUPPOSED
TO SEEM LIKE A GOOD THING
OR A BAD THING

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

TWO.

I WENT TO BED
AT 5
LAST NIGHT.
I WASN'T DRUNK.
NOW I AM AND
IT'S 2:15.
I DON'T KNOW
WHAT I"M DOING
OR WHY.
I KNOW I JUST
WANT CONTROL
TO BE LOST
AND THINKING
TO BE FLUSHED DOWN
THE SHITTER.
I TURNED MY
SPACE HEATER ON
AND AM SITTING ON
MY BLACK CARPET.
IF I WERE REALLY
TRYING TO
CONCENTRATE ON
THE MOMENT
I'D REALIZE THAT
I WAS DRUNK
AND SITTING IN
FRONT OF A SPACE
HEATER
ON A BLACK
CARPET.
ALONE.

HERO

I GOT A FUCKING
SHITTY HAIRCUT TODAY.
I GUESS IT WAS
MY FAULT
FOR ACTING
LIKE AN ASSHOLE.
I TOLD HIM
TO GIVE ME A HAIRCUT
LIKE THE PICTURE HANGING
ON THE WALL.
NOW I'VE HAD THREE
40'S
OF COLT 45.
I'VE NEVER ATTEMPTED
TO HAVE THIS
MANY BEFORE.
IM SURROUNDED
BY DRUNKEN
RANTS FROM
PEERS.
SURROUNDED BY
NOISE INSPIRED
BY CAMUS.
FUCK YOU.
FUCK YOU.
FUCK YOU.
WORK FUCKING SUCKS.
FUCK IT.
YOU WANT POETRY?
WATCHES SOAKED
BY DEODORANT
ON A WOODEN DESK
WITH A SCANNER
AND A GUITAR
TUNER.
PLACED ON A METAL
SCULPTURE OF NEW YORK
THAT I WON'T SEE.
KENDRA.
I WANT TO JOIN THE
CARPET CLUB.
DANIEL.
I EXPECT YOU TO BE
DRUNK ON WINE
AND FIGHTING A
CAT WHEN I ARRIVE.

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

HERE IS TO YOU LITTLE BUTTERFLY

HERE IS TO YOU
MY ROOMMATE IS
SITTING ACROSS THE
TABLE FROM ME
SHE SILENTLY TOLERATES
ME
MY ROOMMATE
SHE IS STONE SOBER

HERE IS TO YOU
I HOLD UP MY GLASS
BRYNN, MY ROOMMATE
SHE READS CELEBRITY GOSSIP
AND SITS
MILDLY

HERE IS TO YOU
LITTLE BUTTERFLY
HERE IS TO YOU
I AM HOLDING MY
GLASS UP
I AM SHOUTING
HERE IS TO YOU
DARLING

MY ROOMMATE
SHE THINKS IVE
HAD TOO MUCH TO DRINK

HERE IS TO YOU
HERE IS TO YOU
HERE IS TO YOU
AND YOUR BEAUTIFUL
WAYS ABOUT YOU

HERE IS TO YOU
AND HERE IS TO ME
AND HERE IS TO
THE EXCELLENT FRIENDSHIP
WE WILL HAVE

HERE IS TO YOU
HERE IS TO YOU
HERE IS TO YOU

Monday, January 21, 2008

WHAT THE FUCK IS LOVE, LOVE IS TOTALLY FUCKED

I REALIZED TODAY
THAT TRADITIONAL
MONOGAMOUS LOVE
IS NOT FOR ME

I ALSO REALIZED
THAT ROMANTIC LOVE
IS NOT FOR ME

I PREFER PLATONIC LOVE
I LOVE MY FRIENDS
TO THE DEATH
THRU THE DEATH
PAST THE DEATH
IF THERE IS EVEN SUCH A THING

AND SOMEDAY
I WOULD LIKE TO FIND
A SPECIAL FRIEND
TO SLEEP WITH
AND LIVE WITH
PROBABLY TO DIE WITH
THAT DOES NOT MIND
WHEN I SLEEP WITH OTHER PEOPLE
WHO WOULD SLEEP WITH OTHER
PEOPLE TOO
AND WE COULD TALK ABOUT IT
LIKE FRIENDS
SUCH LOVING FRIENDS

REALLY
I ENJOY TAKING CARE
OF PEOPLE
AND MAKING THEM LAUGH
I LIKE TO FEED PEOPLE
I DONT CARE MUCH
ABOUT GENDER
OR AGE
OR RACE

WHAT I REALLY
LOVE
IS BEING
SUCH GOOD FRIENDS
WITHOUT
WEIGHTY EXPECTATIONS

SOMEHOW
THESE DESIRES
FOR OPEN FRIENDSHIPS
SEEMS TO MAKE ME
FEEL QUITE UNFEMININE

DEARS

DANIEL
AND JUSTIN
SOMEDAY
I WILL HAVE WORKED
IN TV
LONG ENOUGH
I WILL HAVE SOLD
MY PROFESSIONAL
GOODS
LONG ENOUGH
TO BUY
BOTH OF YOU
PLANE TICKETS
TO COME VISIT ME
AND WE WILL HAVE
A SLUMBER PARTY
AND BE DRUNK
ON MY LIVING ROOM FLOOR
BECAUSE I DONT LIKE
SITTING ON COUCHES
SO MUCH
WE WILL SIT
AND DRINK WINE
AND
BE VERY GOOD FRIENDS
UNTIL THEN
I WILL WRITE YOU BOTH
POEMS
ABOUT
HOW WONDERFUL
I IMAGINE YOU BOTH
TO BE

I DRANK VERY FAST A 40 AND TWO BEERS AND A SHOT OF RUM AFTER WORK

KENDRA I DO THIS UNPOETIC THING ALL THE TIME
IT IS WALKING INTO A DOORWAY
MADE OF DOORS

HERE I WILL TRY FOR A POETIC THING
IT IS WALKING THROUGH THE WATER
SEARCHING FOR SOMETHING WITH MY FEET

P.S.
THE BOOK LOOKS BEAUTIFUL

FUCK THOSE HYPOCRITICAL WEBSITES, I THINK IM GOING TO TRY TO TAKE A HOT BATH NOW, YES THAT IS THE KEY I MAY SLEEP TONIGHT AFTER ALL, NO MAYBE NOT

IM DRINKING
VODKA AND WATER
AT FOUR IN THE MORNING
AND IT IS DREADFUL
TASTING, WE DONT
EVEN HAVE ICE

BUT I TRIED TO SLEEP
WITHOUT ALCOHOL OR
SLEEP AIDS
JUST THIS ONE NIGHT
AND IT WAS FRUITLESS

I GOT OUT OF BED
AND GOOGLED
NATURAL SLEEP AIDS
AND ALL I FOUND
WAS A LOT OF WEBSITES
TELLING ME TO RELAX

FUCK THOSE WEBSITES
THEY WERE STRESSING ME OUT
COUNTER PRODUCTIVE
PIECES OF SHIT

THIS DRINK TASTES HORRIBLE
BUT AT LEAST
THE VODKA
AND WATER
IS NOT
HYPOCRITICAL
LIKE THOSE
FUCKING
COUNTER PRODUCTIVE
WEBSITES

DANIEL
WHY DONT YOU LIVE DOWN
THE BLOCK FROM ME
SO WE CAN HAVE THESE
CONVERSATIONS
IN PERSON

FUCK THOSE WEBSITES

DO YOU EVER WRITE
A POEM
AND THEN REALIZE
THAT THERE IS NOTHING
POETIC IN THE POEM
WHEN YOU ARE DONE?
FUCK THOSE POEMS

FUCK THOSE WEBSITES

Thursday, January 17, 2008

WIRELESS

WE TRIED TO CORRESPOND
BLURRED INTERACTIONS
WEARING A AN 80'S PATTERNED
SWEATER
THAT NEEDED TO
BE CLEANED.
A SPOKEN THOUGHT IN A
PARTICULAR MOMENT
PROCESSED SEVERAL
WAYS
IN A HUMAN JIGSAW PUZZLE.
EACH DEEP BREATH
A
FUTURE TENSE
OF A FRACTION AND
ANOTHER SPECIES
OF INTELLIGENCE
WITH
THE SAME FATE
AS THE OTHERS.

Sunday, January 13, 2008

DRUNK POEM FRIDAY

I LOVE EVERY PERSON IN THE WORLD
I ODN'T WANT YOU TO PEE HURT
YOU HAVE A KINDEY INFECTION
I AM GOING TO DIE
I AM SO COLD
I LOVE YOU SERIOUSLY
WHO THE FUCK STOLE MY COAT
WHERE DID MY FUCKING RUM GO
I AM PUKING BLOOD OH FUCK
I AM GOING TO DIE
I NEED TO BRUSH MY TEETH
I AM GOING TO DIE
I DON'T REMEMBER WRITING THIS

Friday, January 11, 2008

YOU LIKE HOCKEY FOR ALL OF THE BLOOD

IM LISTENING TO
YOUR MUSIC AGAIN
I LISTEN OFTEN,
DANIEL

I HAVE BEEN
INSPIRED
I AM GOING TO
EAT MY GRANDPA
HE IS SMALL
VERY SMALL

BUT I BELIEVE
HE WILL TASTE GOOD
WITH HIS OLD MAN
COLOGNE
ACTUALLY HE DOES
NOT WEAR COLOGNE

ACTUALLY IM NOT GOING
TO DO THAT AT ALL
BUT I AM
GOING TO GET A
TATTOO OF
BROCCOLI AND
TAPE WORMS
FUCK YOU
DANIEL

Thursday, January 10, 2008

IT IS JUST NOT ENOUGH

I JUST SPOKE WITH
MY EX BOYFRIEND
AND INTERMITTENT
LOVER FOR
THREE HOURS
ABOUT A LOT
OF NOTHING

I FEEL VERY
ALONE
RIGHT NOW,
DANIEL
I NEED TO
DRINK MORE WINE
EVERY NIGHT
TO FEEL OKAY
WITH SLEEPING WITH
ONLY MY CAT
TO KEEP ME
COMPANY

MY LIPS BURN
RIGHT NOW
IM NOT SURE WHY
I DONT KNOW
IF THAT IS EVEN RELEVANT

WHAT SUCKS THE MOST IN
MY LIFE
RIGHT NOW
IS
I DONT EVEN HAVE
THE WILL
TO MASTURBATE

Tuesday, January 8, 2008

FUCK

IVE BEEN TALKING ABOUT
CHILDHOOD WITH MY ROOMMATE
ALL EVENING
I TOLD HER ABOUT FROSTBITE
AND OLD PEOPLE
DYING BECAUSE IT
WAS TOO COLD TO
RETRIEVE THEIR KEYS
AND SHE TOLD ME
ABOUT A WINTER WHERE
THERE WAS TREES
THAT GREW STONE FRUIT
CITRUS
EVERYWHERE
AND FLOWERES ON EVERY BLOCK
ALL I HAD TO TALK ABOUT WAS
WINTER
WITH PAIN
AND ABSURD DEATH
AND I BECAME SELF CONSCIENCE
OF THE DEATH AROUND ME AS A CHILD
AND HER PARADISE FURTHER
MADE A POINT OF HOW
THE COLD WINTER
STEALS YOU SPIRITS
AND MAKES
A SORT OF
SURVIVOR OF YOU
AND WHAT THAT MUST DO
TO YOUR
MENTAL CONDITION